Crushed with defeat

There's a not so fun thing about hypoglycemia: extreme excitement over foods I can eat often leads to enormous disappointment when it turns out I can't.  Sometimes those new foods turn out to be triggers for a hypoglycemic crash.

I crashed (big) yesterday after having flax foccacia toast with breakfast.  There are other possible contributing factors, but the bread is the most likely cause.  I was totally depressed until I decided to either get some real medical help here real soon or go back to the States for help.  I mean in the next week or two.  I can't wait until February to fix this.  Obviously I'm not that successful with self-treatment.  I know I'm generally better, but I should be pretty much symptom-free if I'm eating right and that's just not the case.

Furthermore, after a year, I should have a better handle on what I can and cannot eat.  For instance, I can't for the life of me figure out what the real, biological difference is between a grain, a nut, and a seed.  And it therefore seems totally illogical that I can't have the first one, but I can have the others.  Are grains not also seeds?  And did the fact that I had a blob of fiber for breakfast, thereby making breakfast less protein-heavy, cause my crash?  Are there more carbs in flax than I thought?  Or was it the baking powder in the recipe which probably has some corn starch in it?  If I use baking soda and cream of tartar instead, can I eat the bread with breakfast?  Or is this bread fine as long as I eat it later in the day when I can tolerate things better?  Should I be eating anything that I have to schedule like that?  I mean isn't it bad no matter what, even if I can better tolerate it at certain times?

I need to attack this more aggressively, because not only do I suffer, but everyone around me does too. And it's really taking its toll on me for sure.

Maybe I will only have meat and squash for a while and see what happens.  I'm also seriously thinking about looking into the cost of a personal chef for a month or so and calling it a medical expense.  I can't deal with food anymore.  It's overwhelming.  I have to eat so often and every single time it's a difficult decision for a foggy brain to handle.  Then add to that that I have to find creative ways to feed a picky toddler to eat.  I have to be honest and say that many times I just give Regin a piece of bread and/or cheese because my sad, slothy, hypoglycemia-addled brain can't manage to come up with something better, and my patience is so low thanks to my low blood sugar that I will do almost anything for Regin to stop whining, even if it's only been a few seconds since he started.  So much for the mom who was going to work so hard to make sure her son had good nutrition.  And the cycle continues.  He'll undoubtedly suffer similar health problems as a result.

This can't go on!  A change has to be made right away!

Will keep you posted.